28 april 2004.1254 am

the kids i nanny live in a part of town that is on a hill and semi-far away from any stores. they have a small shopping center that is mostly abandonded except for a gas station, a coffee shop, and a "convenience" store. this store is run by old asian people who speak very poor english. they sell chips, candy, ice cream, cigarettes, lotto tickets, more liquor than i have ever seen in one place at one time, and pornography. when i say "pornography," i mean they have a big rack of filthy magazines that say stuff like "MILF: OLDEST LADIES EVER SEEN IN THIS ISSUE!!!" inbetween the beer display and the funyuns. also if you look behind the counter near where the cigarettes are they have stacks and stacks of porno tapes, for when you dont want to drive down the hill to get your jerkoff material i suppose.

but anyway. today after work i went in the Alcoholic Porno Mart to buy cigarettes. i was wearing my le tigre shirt that has oriental-inspired cats on the chest, and the old asian woman apparently liked my shirt so much that she took it upon herself to run her hands over the cats, multiple times. this means, of course, she ran her hands over my breasts, multiple times. and you know i'm not really a person to be struck speechless by much but this did it. i just stood there trying to sort it out when she told me in her very broken english that i was "lucky." it took me a minute, and then i said [i swear to christ] "you mean the cats right?" because who knows, maybe she was just impressed by my big funbags. i'll never know though because now im afraid to go in there, especially since after she touched my boobs she pretended to eat my keys.

there are two morals to this story. 1. everyone touches my tits all the time for no reason [example here]. is that technically a moral? oh well. and more importantly 2. asian people are crazy. goodnight.