12 April 2005.11:50 pm

sunday i went to a show at codys house in santa cruz and i'm pretty sure 75% of the girls in santa cruz have the same head. same hair, same makeup, same head.

before the show there was some killer AFV happening. it was the $10000 winner and of course it went to some baby doing something ridiculous. not that funny, but still: america's funniest home videos are the best icebreaker at parties. you could be sitting around with a bunch of people who are all friendly and want to talk amicably but with nothing to say... and then on tv a man gets bitten in the nuts by a dachsund. INSTANT CONVERSATION. this always leads to talking of other funniest videos, including but most definitely not limited to the one where the fat guy on a slip n slide slipslides past the lawn, under a cyclone fence and onto the sidewalk. BONUS JOKE: the fat man bears a striking resemblance to new german cinema auteur rainer fassbinder. imagining fassbinder in a swimsuit is silly enough, but paired with a slip n slide? priceless.

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1. FASSBINDER: cody gave me his reader from his fassbinder/sirk class, because somehow when my 1980s hollywood professor asked us to write an "analysis of trends in film from the 1980s to the present" i came up with "sirkian melodrama and john waters' 'polyester.'" it has nothing to do with the given prompt, but i managed to get it approved. also i have a paper due in film history concerning bergman's "persona" and polanski's "repulsion," and i hope by the end of that i have dead men all over the house.

2. GERMAN CINEMA: when i was 17 i wrote two completely amazing screenplays for my film class. one was in german, the other in swedish. i found "ding an sich" last night and its mega ultra incredible. SEIEN VERDAMMT DAS LEBEN MONOTON. anyone know what that means? coz i dont speak german. or swedish. cody and i are going to remake "ding an sich" utilizing only 12 frames per cut, and then i want to send a copy to my high school film teacher with a note that says HEY MIZ SIDLEY, IVE DROPPED OUT OF COLLEGE 3 TIMES NOW. I WANT TO DRINK WHISKEY AND UPHOLSTER FURNITURE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE BUT I STILL CAN MAKE TERRIBLE SHORT FILMS. THANKS FOR SHOWING ME NIGHT ON EARTH WHILE EVERYONE ELSE HAD TO WATCH THE THIN BLUE LINE. XO ASHLEY.
i was one of her favorites, see.

3. CODY: sometimes i forget that cody is my BFF 4 LYFE, and then i remember my plans to go to the renaissance faire dressed up like an executioner [only because i want to see how many nerdy fat dudes i can get to hit on me] and i know that cody will be right there by my side, dressed up in the wizard costume im going to make him.

in other news, recently my mother yelled at me because i said reflexology is stupid. "YES THERE ARE MERIDIANS IN THE BODY, ASHLEY!"