21 october 2003.937 pm

this weekend i was at what was probably the Least Interesting Party I've Ever Been To, so after about an hour and a half i had enough and decided i was clearheaded enough to drive home.... im sure we all see where this is going. yes, i ran into a schoolbus full of disabled veterans, orphaned babies, and golden retriever puppies. naturally the bus exploded upon impact; i, however, walked away unscathed and smoked another marijuana cigarette, oblivious to the destruction i just caused. PARTY ON BRAH!

no, thats a lie, what i actually did was back up into the car parked behind me as i attempted to get out of my parking space. it made a huge scary noise, and then i stopped, assessed the situation, and then drove off really fast. my reason for driving off without leaving a note: i drive a shitty 87 tercel. i backed into an equally shitty, but much larger and sturdier jeep. i figure any damage was entirely on my car. and besides, that'll learn you to park near me. i made it home without hitting anything else. be proud.

i checked my car the next morning, there was no dents or scrapes at all. im betting that the jeep has no battle wounds on it either. in fact, you could probably estimate that the jeep is now in BETTER condition, now that i hit it. yes.

also, please remember that my job is driving children around. i rule.

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